The pain is horrible tonight.  It’s been pretty bad for the last couple of days and tonight it’s quickly becoming unbearable.  It still kills me every day that I can’t remember what it feels like to not be in pain.  If I would have known at 9 years old that my world was about to change forever, I would have done so much more.  I guess that’s pretty much everyone else’s story too.  At 10 years old my whole world turned upside down.  I went to bed one night being a healthy and extremely active kid and seemingly woke up with pain and frustration.  I really thought it was just the pain for a long time, but looking back now I also had horrible insomnia and anxiety.  It’s pretty obvious why pain, insomnia and anxiety travel together.  When you put them all in a 10 year old, they become a nightmare.  That’s a nightmare I’m still waiting to wake up from 22 years later.

It’s life-changing to the least, but regardless this is still my life and I’m going to continue living it the best way I know how.  The first time I typed the last sentence I left out two words. I’m doing that more and more.  Maybe I need to stop writing when I’m in a flare and the fibro fog is bad.  Don’t get me started on fibro fog.  The last few days I have felt absolutely crazy.  It’s frustrating!  I left out another word.  I should at least get credit for catching it, but it makes me wonder how many times I don’t catch it.  Oh well that’s a whole different story.  I’ll get into that when I can actually think and have a memory span longer than a goldfish.

I hope everyone had an awesome day or night depending on where you’re at.  Gentle hugs and lots of love.


Hi Christina I'm Hubert I just finished writing you a long response but couldn't post it it was on you most recent post , I forget the title. I have had F?M since 8, i am 53 now, and it has ruined everything in my life over and over and over again. I fully understand you pain and frustration and anger I deal with the same things 24/7 in the other post you asked for sleep help that is what prompted me to respond

if you have headphones listen to this twice before you go to bed it really worked for me

later if you like you might want to have a read at my blog site, just know that I understand what you live with completely. I live it too


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