Smiling Through the Pain

The pain is annoying as hell right now, but I’m happy to announce that I still have a smile on my face.  I love when I’m strong enough to smile through the pain and I despise when I let the pain get the best of me.  By tonight I’ll be in that situation.  I’ll be exhausted and too frustrated to deal with the pain anymore.  I’ll get mad and I’ll probably cry, but I know that if I’m blessed with another day then when the morning comes I’ll be strong enough to do it all over again.  This isn’t the best life, but it’s mine and even though my illnesses totally suck I’m still able to live and I can’t ask for more.  Anything past living is a special bonus and I’ve learned to take nothing for granted. 

I used to say that I’m not living…I’m just surviving.  Some days that’s still true, but things have changed and I’m starting to feel like I have a place in this world again.  I have a boyfriend who loves me unconditionally, I have friends and family who are slowly starting to accept and understand my illness and I’m getting that “I want to conquer the world” feeling back.  Support and understanding changes everything in the life of someone with a chronic illness. 

Anyways I think I have rambled on enough.  I hope everyone is having an awesome day.  Gentle hugs and lots of love.


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