Fighting that Feeling of Defeat

Life has been slightly more difficult lately, not bad, just difficult.  The illnesses have gained up on me and the fatigue and pain is overwhelming at times.  I’m close to feeling defeated, but I keep fighting.  No matter how tired I am I try to accomplish something.  It helps keep that feeling of defeat at bay for a little while longer.
I have so much I need to do, but my body feels heavy and my muscles are so tight that I’m afraid to sneeze because it hurts like hell.  All day today I’ve tried to put as many positive thoughts in my head as possible, because I have to keep my mind strong, because my body is struggling.

I’ve felt like I’ve been in this slump for way too long, but I think back to this time last year and I was feeling about the same way.  There always seems to be a strange pattern with illnesses like Fibromyalgia.  I understand it a little more now, but so much of it is still a mystery.  That’s what makes it so hard to deal with.  I’m the type of person who wants to know details about how things function and how things work.  I’m the same way with my illnesses, especially Fibro.  There are so many questions that have no answers.  That alone drives me crazy and I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels that way.

I’m probably rambling at this point.  I’m surprised I can compose a complete sentence.  I hope all of you are as well as possible.  If you’re not and want to rant about it then please feel free to do so here.  Sometimes you just have to cry, yell and scream to feel better.  There’s no shame in that.

Gentle Hugs and Lots of Love!


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