I need to be working whether it be cleaning my house or writing an article, but I’m in pain and it has reached the excruciating point. Not a day goes by that I don’t wish I could live at least a fraction of a normal life. I want to be able to get up and go to work, then come home and cook and clean. I want to be able to socialize with my friends without worrying about how much pain I’m going to be in afterwards. I want to be able to go out of town on a moment’s notice without worrying about how I feel and if I have all my medications. I just want to be me again.
I have days that I am at peace with my diagnosis and my new life that has come from it and then I have days where I take too many steps backwards and I’m angry and frustrated and I can’t handle being sick. Today is one of those days. I’m tired of having to tell my family and friends that I can go somewhere with them IF I feel okay. I’m suppose to go see a movie with my niece in a few hours and I don’t know if I’m going to be able to go because the pain is so bad right now.
How do you cope with a chronic illness? How do you get through the bad days and how do you find the strength to keep going?
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